Lights, Camera, SEC Football: Movie Quotes Tell the Story of Week 2

OXFORD, Miss. – This is the best part of the college football season. Each team has played and no matter the result of the openers, there is still hope for each squad to have a successful season.

Though hope will dim for some teams in the coming weeks, on this day in September, everyone has hope.

There are many examples of hope. But the best might come from Hollywood.

“Remember Red, hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies.”

                        — Andy Dufresne, The Shawshank Redemption, 1994

That was well said.

Here in the second week of play, what line from Tinseltown would be appropriate for each SEC team’s game?

Here are some ideas to wrap up the weekend:

No. 7 TEXAS 38, SAN JOSE STATE 7

“Oh no, don’t do that. If you shoot him, you’ll just make him mad.”

            –Jim, The Waco Kid. Blazing Saddles, 1974

When Sheriff Bart is heading out to confront Mongo in the Mel Brooks classic, Jim tells him not to take a gun because it will awaken a sleeping monster.

San Jose State was probably thinking that when Texas and Arch Manning fell last week at Ohio State.

Manning made a few errant throws as he did last week, but he made a bunch of positive plays.

He completed 19-of-30 passes for 295 yards and four touchdowns. Most impressively, Manning scored on a 20-yard scrambling run. At times he threw like his uncles. During the run he looked like his grandfather.

NEXT UP: UTEP

No. 19 TEXAS A&M 44, UTAH STATE 22

“You know what Stan, if you want me to wear 37 pieces of flair like your pretty boy over there, Brian, why don’t you make the minimum 37 pieces of flair?”

                        Joanna, Office Space, 1999

Like the hard-working waitress in one of the coolest movies ever, Texas A&M did not have a lot of flash, but the Aggies got the job done.

The Aggies did look solid. Marcel Reed passed for 220 yards and three touchdowns, while running for another 66 yards and a score.

Against a tough A&M defense, Utah State could only muster 78 yards on the ground.

NEXT UP: NOTRE DAME

No. 22 TENNESSEE 72, EAST TENNESSEE STATE 17

“You’re gonna need a bigger boat.”

                        -Chief Brody, Jaws, 1975

Yes, ETSU, if you want to sail with the Volunteer Navy, you will need to get a bigger boat.

Joey Aguilar threw for 288 of Tennessee’s 458 yards passing and four players ran for at least 35 yards led by Star Thompson who scored three touchdowns.

Tennessee amassed 734 total yards.

The Bucs had no answer for the Vol defense.  ETSU managed just 216 yards on the day.

NEXT UP: GEORGIA

No. 20 OLE MISS 30, KENTUCKY 23

“Make no mistake. It’s not revenge he’s after. It’s a reckoning.”

—Doc Holliday, Tombstone, 1993

The loss to Kentucky last season was probably the deciding factor that sent Ole Miss to the Gator Bowl instead of the college football playoff.

Lane Kiffin mentioned the Rebels worked on a UK game plan over the summer. That is not just for revenge,

The Rebels got off to a shaky start with sophomore quarterback Austin Simmons throwing two interceptions in the first quarter — for the second game in a row. He rebounded and did throw for 235 yards in the conference opener.

Kewan Lacy led the rushing attack with 138 yards and a touchdown.

Kentucky may be thinking of moving away from Zach Calzada. He left the game in the fourth quarter with a shoulder injury, but he was only 15-of-30 threw the air. Lexington native Cutter Boley came on and completed one pass for 38 yards.

NEXT UP FOR OLE MISS: ARKANSAS

NEXT UP FOR KENTUCKY: EASTERN MICHIGAN

MISSOURI 42, KANSAS 31

“Well, Mr. Carpetbagger, we’ve got something in this territory called the Missouri boat ride.”

 Josey Wales, The Outlaw Josey Wales, 1976

This is the first time these rivals have played since 2011 and it was long overdue.

The Border War does not quite rival the Iron Bowl or Egg Bowl yet, but hearing from the fans from each team, it is just as venomous.

So here is a bonus movie quote:

 “I hate those guys.”

–Dean Vernon Wormer, Animal House, 1978

Mizzou’s Beau Pribula outdueled the Jayhawks’ Jalon Daniels, throwing for 334 yards, while Kansas only amassed 223.

The most impressive part was the Missouri run defense.

The Jayhawks ended up with net three yards on the ground. The leading Kansas rusher had just 17.

NEXT UP: LOUISIANA

SOUTH FLORIDA 18, No. 13 FLORIDA 16

“Who are those guys?”

–Butch Cassidy, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, 1969

Those guys are the South Florida Bulls, and they are good. USF knocked off Boise State in its opener and now Florida, marking the first time the Bulls have beaten ranked teams in back-to-back weeks.

USF quarterback Byrum Brown threw for 263 yards and a score and he led the Bulls in rushing with 66 yards.

D.J. Lagway did have 222 yards passing with a touchdown and an interception, but the Gators simply could not match USF’s intensity.

NEXT UP: at LSU

No. 4 GEORGIA 28, AUSTIN PEAY 6

“You know your problem? You don’t like winners.”

–Otto West, A Fish Called Wanda, 1981

Since UGA did not blow out the Governors, the critics will be out in force this week. It’s not like the Bulldogs are a top five team or anything.

The Dawgs were consistent, scoring a touchdown in each quarter. Gunner Stockton threw for 227 yards and Georgia ran for 190 yards.

UGA’s defense was impressive, surrendering just 45 yards rushing.

NEXT UP: TENNESSEE

ARKANSAS 56, ARKANSAS STATE  14

“Only the meek get pinched. The bold survive.”

                        –Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, 1986

Arkansas State is a solid football program and has been for years, yet this is the first time they have ever played Arkansas.

It was a brave move for the Razorbacks. Had they lost to the Red Wolves, madness would have ensued in the state.

Arkansas’ Taylen Green threw for 239 yards and four touchdowns, but he was intercepted twice.

A-State was limited to 285 yards in total offense.

NEXT UP: at OLE MISS

No. 2 ALABAMA 73, LOUISIANA-MONROE 0

“That’s my only real motivation is not to be hassled, that and the fear of losing my job. But you know, Bob, that will only make someone work just hard enough not to get fired.”

Peter Gibbons, Office Space, 1999

Kalen DeBoer’s job is safe. At least for a week.

The Crimson Tide played as if they were trying to get the fans off their coach’s case.

Bama dominated this one, gaining 583 yards, passing for 371 and running for 212.

ULM was never even a threat. The Warhawks could only manage nine first downs and were held below the century mark in rushing and passing.

NEXT UP: WISCONSIN

AUBURN 42, BALL STATE 3

 “Thank you sir, may I have another!”

                        –Chip Dillard, Animal House, 1978

That is what the fraternity guys forced the pledge to say as he was beating spanked in a ritual. It is what Ball State was saying at the end of each quarter.

Auburn racked up 495 total yards and quarterback Jackson Arnold threw for 251 yards and three touchdowns in limited action.

How dominate was the Tigers’ defense? Ball State could only muster six first downs and finished with minus-3 yard rushing.

NEXT UP: SOUTH ALABAMA

VANDERBILT 44, VIRGINIA TECH 20

“It ain’t armed robbery if the gun ain’t loaded.”

–H.I. McDunnough, Raising Arizona, 1987

Vanderbilt stole this one by scoring 21 points in the fourth quarter to give them wins over Virginia Tech in consecutive seasons.

Diego Pavia was, well, Diego Pavia. The Commodores’ quarterback threw for 193 yards and ran for another 61.

Vandy’s defense was definitely the lookout in this caper. The Hokies did not score in the second half.

NEXT UP: at SOUTH CAROLINA

MISSISSIPPI STATE 24, No. 12 ARIZONA STATE 20

“Over? Nothing is over until we decide it is. Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no, and it ain’t over now. Because when the going gets tough……the tough get going. Who’s with me? Come on, let’s got!”

                       —  John “Bluto” Blutarsky, Animal House, 1978

Blake Shapen threw one of the most important and timely touchdown passes in Mississippi State history. He completed a 58-yard bomb to Brennen Thompson with 30 seconds left to lead the Bulldogs over No. 12 Arizona State.

The Sun Devils had taken a three-point lead with less 1:38 left on a short field goal before Jeff Lebby turned the State sideline into the Delta House rallying speech.

Once the clock ticked down to zero and the Bulldog fans stormed the field, then the fraternity party really began. (The going does get a little tougher after Monday when the Bulldogs were assessed a $500,000 fine for storming the field after the win.)

NEXT UP: ALCORN STATE

SOUTH CAROLINA 38, SOUTH CAROLINA STATE 10

“I’d keep playing, I don’t think the heavy stuff will come down for a while.”

–Carl Spackler, Caddyshack, 1980

Much like the scene in the movie in which the bishop plays a round of golf in a torrential downpour that sent everyone else looking for cover, a storm caused a long delay in this one.

The wet conditions didn’t allow either team to get its footing. Carolina could only manage 253 yards and the Bulldogs picked up 270.

Amazingly, playing with a wet ball, the game only had one turnover and that was a South Carolina State fumble.

NEXT UP: VANDERBILT

LSU 23, LOUISIANA TECH 7

“Hey, there’s no birthday party for me here.”

 —Jeff Spicoli, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, 1982

In the classic comedy, slacker Jeff Spicoli is lured to a classroom in a ruse. When he arrives, there is no celebration waiting for him, just history class.

LSU was expecting a cakewalk against one of its in-state schools, but Louisiana Tech proved not to be a cupcake.

Garrett Nussmeier only threw for 237 yards and the Bulldogs held LSU to 128 yards on the ground.

The Tigers’ defense was stout all night, giving up just 96 yards through the air and 58 yards rushing.

NEXT UP: No. 13 FLORIDA

No. 18 OKLAHOMA 24, No. 15 MICHIGAN 13

“There’s a new sheriff in town and his name is Reggie Hammond.”

–Reggie Hammond, 48 Hrs., 1982

Actually, the new sheriff in Norman, Okla., is John Mateer.

The Washington State transfer threw for 270 yards and a touchdown in the win over Michigan. Not to be one-dimensional, he ran for 74 yards and two more touchdowns.

The Sooners defense was solid, holding the Big Ten team to just 288 total yards

NEXT UP: at TEMPLE